Reflections On 2010

This probably isn't the greatest day for me to reflect on this year. I'm sick for the first time all year--how's that for irony?

2010 was not my favorite year. I got engaged Christmas Eve of '09, which was great but it brought the stress of wedding planning. I really did not enjoy that season of my life. There was so much drama surrounding the planning of the wedding that I still don't know if it was worth it. I was really disenchanted with all of it and realized how much emphasis our culture puts on one single day rather than the marriage that is to come. Nevertheless, I am very happy to be married and being married has been one of the greatest blessings and challenges in my life.

I remember waking up New Year's Day to frozen pipes. That was not my idea of fun. I believe they were frozen for about a week and then froze again a week later. The only good thing was that my landlord paid for the new pipes instead of me. That, and many other things have made me thankful to be a renter.

Last January I took statistics as an intensive course as a prerequisite to a masters program that I had not yet been accepted to. I took the class in faith that this masters program was where God was leading me and that I should pay for this class anyway. I really enjoyed the class and it was one of the best classes I have ever taken. No joke. I loved statistics. I even found a mistake on one of the homework assignments and corrected the professor. I took all this as a sign that this was indeed what God wanted to do.

I was accepted into that masters program and it has been challenging and not what I thought it would be in so many ways. I have made some of the greatest friends, which I did not expect at all. I am so thankful for those friends, though. I could not have made it through the last six months without their friendship. By the grace of God I somehow have a 4.0, and I am so thankful for that, although I feel so undeserving.

Overall, 2010 has been very bittersweet. Which I think is a hot word right now because of Shauna Niequist's book that was released this year. I haven't read it yet, so this is all me. The wedding planning was bitter, the marriage is sweet. Grad school is bitter, the friendships are sweet. Frozen pipes was bitter, not having to pay for new pipes is sweet.

Grace

I now know what it feels like to receive grace. Yet another thing that grad school has taught me.

By the grace of God I somehow got a 4.0 for the last semester. I can't say earned, because when it is grace it cannot be earned.

I know that I did not have what it took to get a 4.0. Well, maybe I had it, but I wasn't using it. I procrastinated too much and put in what I felt was too little, too late.

But, maybe I was trying harder than I thought. Or maybe God is faithful, even when it comes to my GPA.

I can tell you one thing, I am blessed.

What I Learned This Semester

1. Taking 20 hours of graduate classes is insanity.

2. It can be done without pulling an all-nighter.

3. However, coffee/caffeine is absolutely necessary. I revitalized my caffeine addiction.

4. It really matter what professor you take a class with. The same course with 2 different profs leads to 2 very different outcomes.

5. The class I dreaded the most was my favorite, because the prof was awesome.

6. I have never experienced so much self-doubt in my life.

7. I am losing respect for Phd's. They are so out of touch with the real world (most of them).

8. It is not possible to have a clean house during finals week.

9. I am more thankful than I have ever been to be on Christmas break.

10. I've met some of the greatest people.

Can't wait for next semester to be over!

Hiatus

So, if anyone else has taken 20 credit hours of grad classes they will understand when I say I am and have been on a blogging hiatus until Christmas break gets here.

Here's hoping I actually survive and make it there!

Things That End In -ation

The process of registration has begun. I never dreamed that registration would be so difficult. I guess I thought since the college I went to was so small and I never had any issues registering then that I wouldn't have any issues now. That was definitely some flawed logic. Whereas then I could actually make my schedule and count on it not to change, now I just write down the course numbers and when I go to register I hope that whatever is still available will all meld together somehow.

The "good" thing is that one of my classes is online and I don't have to worry about getting into it because the assistant dean has already told me that they will have to create a special spot for me. Ah, a secure spot. The bad thing is that it is an online class. I am really not looking forward to taking an online class. at. all. I've never taken one and I am kind of doubting I have the discipline it takes to be in an online class. Oh well. Guess I'm just going to have to buck up and do it. At least I don't have to drive to class.

Which brings me to my next concern. Do I take the class I really want to take or do I take the class that makes it possible for me to drive less? Or do I take the class that allows me to nanny for a really cute 1.5 year old and allows me to make a little extra money? Really, it doesn't matter what I want. It's all about what class will still have open seats in it at 6 pm tomorrow night.

Making all of this even worse is that I am stressed out by the sheer amount of homework that needs to be done in the next month. Adding to that stress is this sore feeling in my throat. I have a feeling this isn't going to end well.