I remember feeling overwhelmed during the first week of classes my freshman year of college---good ol' syllabus shock. Having only written one paper in high school (and only four pages at that) I was not prepared to write multiple papers over a 15 week period. Well, I did and I survived. Looking back I wonder why I was so freaked out by those syllabi.
I am hoping that in December I will look back and wonder why I was so freaked out in August. I have only seen one of three syllabi and already I am dreading the workload that this semester will bring. I feel like a freshman again. I feel just as unprepared as I did then. I haven't written a paper in nearly ten months. I haven't been in a classroom for ten months. It just feels weird to even walk around on campus. I am wondering how on earth I will ever get through the next two to three years.
To be honest I am filled with a lot of worry and doubt. I am doubting my own abilities and I am worried that seminary will just be too hard. I am also remembering that someone once said worry and doubt are practical atheism. So I am going to choose to trust God. To trust that I am right where he wants me to be.
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